Thursday, December 27, 2007

Game 37; Pens vs. Caps

Laraque wearing the mic during the pre-game talking to Gary Roberts: "Oh my God! Potash shoots harder than that!"

Errey on Taffe's goal: "That's that secondary scoring you always hear so much about in the NHL. Or in this case, maybe even third-dary!"


Sunday, December 23, 2007

Game 36; Pens vs. Bruins

I ended up at this game as well.

However, from the post-game show, courtesy of Sean:
The Ol' Two-Niner was discussing the play where Eaton got hurt. When that play happened, apparently Errey stuck his head in the radio booth and just yelled, "Slew foot! Slew foot!" then went back to calling the game.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Game 35; Pens vs. Isles

I was at the game, so yet again I missed Errey between the glass. Very depressing...

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Game 34; Pens vs. Bruins

"If Pittsburgh gets a goal here they can spoil the tea party!"

Anyone else notice that Crosby used the fighting technique from the Mighty Ducks movies?

1) Stick
2) Gloves
3) Shirt

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Game 33; Pens vs. Rangers

This game was so awful I think even Errey fell asleep and had nothing to say...

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Game 32; Pens vs. Isles

"Ruutu was lying on top of Chris Simon for an eternity! They were going for a roll in the hay!"

"I'm sorry Sidney. Macaroni and cheese! It's not that hard, figure it out!" (Wait...what?)

Friday, December 14, 2007

Game 31; Pens vs. Ottawa

I missed most of this game due a game of my own and having to get skates sharpened. Such is life... I did catch a couple though:

(Montage of shots of dudes in Santa hats eating)
Steiggy: "A lot of hungry Santas at the game tonight."
Errey: "They're trying to fatten up, Steiggy!"

This next one comes to me via text message from Nick, so I don't know if it was actually said. On the other hand, it's too plausible for it to not have been said:
"We gotta find some holes in that Swiss goalie!"

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Game 30; Pens vs. Flyers

Embarrassing. Let's move on...

Filling in for Errey and Steiggy...Doc and Edzo!

Emrick after the first hat trick as hats rain upon the ice: "It was a warm day in Philly today so hats weren't worn for the cold. Some were worn for warmth, but others were worn for style."

Edzo on coaching on the losing side of a blowout: "I've been in that situation myself and..." (It doesn't matter how this sentence was ended. It had to be included because it was hilariously truthful.)

So now I will end this with a question:
Do you think it's awkward for Jordan Staal to be living with Mark Recchi now?

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Game 29; Pens vs. Canucks

"There's the pickle-stabber with Staal's long pole."

Steiggy: "It looked like there were three Ryan Malone's out there on that shift."
Errey: "There were two Sedin's, why not three Ryan Malone's?!?!?!?"

Power moves: Staal, Malone

And just to be clear...when was the last time we played in Vancouver? Wait...did Marcus Naslund have a good game that night? He had how many goals? And the last one was in overtime?

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Game 28; Pens vs. Flames

Kris Letang is "handsy." (Note to self: start counting use of the phrase "Murphy dump.")

"When they're butt to chest, Crosby has the advantage."

Little known fact: Owen Nolan is still in the NHL.

Ryan Malone? He's "handsy" too.

We now know that Gary Roberts' Office is in the opponent's crease. Last night (and many, many previous nights) we learned that Laraque's Office is behind the opposing team's net. New goal for the season: determine where the offices of every Penguins player happens to be.

In case you were wondering: Kris Letang? Still handsy. I hear he also has a long stick.

# of Murphy dumps: 2 (possibly more)

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Game 27; Pens vs. Oilers

"Are you calling Laraque a wimp?"

"All Semenko had to do was look at you. He stared me down one time and just said, 'kid, I'm going to kill you.' That was it. He didn't need to take a penalty to get his point across."

Steiggy: "It's like he's (Roloson) got some...sticky stuff on that logo. He keeps holding on to them."

"How you gonna get through his legs and butt?"

Steiggy: "Then it was like an avalanche..."
Errey: "...or an oil gusher...or a hole in the Trans-Atlantic Pipeline!"

Edit: I failed to previously point out that Downtown Robbie Brown (aka Michel Oullet 1989) was in the booth for approximately eight minutes of game time. Highlights:

-having it pointed out that Molinari once described his skating as being like him "wearing galoshes and running on the beach in the sand." This is entirely too accurate...

-Errey goading him into doing his goal scoring celebratory fist pump. This led to MO89 cracking his elbow hard off the wall behind them.

We should place bets on which former Penguin player from the days of Errey shows up in the booth next. (I will also accept appearance by text message, as Dave Hannan provided earlier this season)

New addition to the drinking game: take a drink anytime Laraque is "in his office behind the net." Two drinks if he's "in Gretzky's Offce."

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Game 26; Pens vs. "Wayne Gretzky's Phoenix Coyotes"

Due to an internerd outage and my unwillingness to write anything down on a piece of paper, I didn't really get much from this game...or I forgot it already...

"(Bryzgalov) looked like a Clydesdale making that save!"

I just wish I had the appropriate documentation to accurately convey the giant man-crushes Steiggy and Errey had on both Bryzgalov and Keith Ballard.

PS Smell ya later Recchin' Ball. Keep pumping those tiny legs!

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Game 25: Staal's neck beard vs. McCabe's mustache

"We're still looking for our Subway Sandwich of the Game. That right there will be a candidate. I had Subway sandwich earlier today, actually. Tuna!"

Game 24: Pens vs. Stars

I only saw about five minutes of the game, so I didn't really get anything. Though I swear I heard the following at some point:

" out with a sports hernia. What do they call it if you don't play sports? Is it just hernia then?"

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Game 23; Pens vs. Thrashers

"Staal with that long fishing pole!"

"Then Ruutu hits Laraque! He says, 'you can't hit everybody, I'm going to hit you!'"

"Malkin can normally get the puck to do whatever he wants. It's like he has a remote control. Tonight I think he needs to replace the batteries in that remote!" (I think I butchered this one...)

"Gonchar looked like Baryshnikov tap dancing across the blue line!"

On the high school football championships:
Steiggy: "They're just playing for pride, each other, their community, their parents... It's really fun to watch!"
Errey: "They should be playing for money with the amount of taxes I pay!"

"Rock 'em Ruutu... He is kinda like a Rock 'em Sock 'em robot. You bop him in the head, he'll go down. He'll do some bopping himself."

"Sidney Crosby there with a wide base like a water bug..."

Friday, November 23, 2007

Game 22; Pens vs. Senators

I didn't get to see much of this game unfortunately. What parts I did see I couldn't really pay attention to the sound. Bummer...

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Game 21; Pens vs. Devils

"Malone is where he is..."

"Now he (Clarkson) wants a piece of Roberts! That's stepping it up a notch, isn't it?"

(Side note: what did Malkin do to deserve Christensen and Armstrong as line mates?)

Errey : "I'm gonna eat my fishies. I don't know if they're organic or not. Mr. Roberts may be mad at me. He'll be looking for turkeys tomorrow in Ottawa!"
Steiggy: "Say it don't spray it!"


Steiggy: "A kerfuffle here in the Penguins zone."

"Does Sid ever talk about what a pain in the ass Madden is to play against?"

"You smell good Max. What are you wearing?"

"Your best penalty killer has got to be your goaltender...and the goal post..."

"I say it the way I see it, and that's the way I saw it."

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Game 20; Pens vs. Rangers

I missed the first half of this game due to a hockey game of my own. I didn't get much from this game because I was beat and could only half pay attention. It's a shame since Errey's usually hilarious when between the boards.

"Christensen tries to get in position to unleash that Howitzer of his..."

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Game 19; Pens vs. Isles

"Laraque is like a big moose out there and he was hunting down the Islanders defense!"

"Gonchar is going to get the goal, but watch Jordan Staal. The big oak tree in front of the net!"

Errey: "What are you up to now, Coff?"
Paul Coffey: "I'm in the car business...and boy have I got a deal for you!"

Fast forward to later...
"Yeah, but don't think I'm gonna buy a car off you or anything."

Side note: Did Errey just say he still owns the same bicycle (a brown Schwinn) since the days Coffey played in Pittsburgh. I am impressed by that longevity

Paul Coffey in the booth talking about Letang reminded me entirely too much of Bill Parcells talking about Terrell Owens. Except instead of only referring to him as "the player," he only referred to him as "the young kid." "The young kid is out there again. The young kid has good vision."

Additional Letang note: apparently he is this year's rookie with a long stick. We all know where this is going...

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Game 18 Part II, Electric Boogaloo

Sam mentioned this to me today and I couldn't let this slide:

Does anyone else find it a bit odd that Steiggy kept referring to Johnny Oduya* (Stockholm, Sweden), Georges Laraque (Montreal, Quebec, Canada), and Kevin Weekes** (Toronto, Ontario, Canada) as African-Americans?

Something about that seems a bit wrong, but I can't figure out what...

* Perhaps my new favorite name in hockey now that Aki Berg is no longer in the league...

**Weekes, by the way, "(was) not weak" last night, according to Errey.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Game 18; Pens vs. Devils

"Laraque got the wood out and he got his money's worth!"


On Jeremy Roenick's 500th NHL goal:
"You think that will get him in the Hall of Fame, Steiggy? If not, I bet he'll talk his way in!"

"Oh, Steiggy! There's something you don't see too often in the NHL! That was one man and one boy!"

On Jarkko Ruutu:
Errey: "He's not the Finnish Flash..."
Steiggy: "He's the Finnish Crash! That's what he is."
(For some reason, you'd think those quotes would be reversed, yet I rewound and listened several times and it appears as though I transcribed it accurately...)

Wait wait wait...did Errey just compare Laraque to Gretzky?!?!?!? He did? Okay, let's just proceed like that didn't happen. At least he realized the insanity of what he just said...

"...and Staal tries to tip it in with that long fishing pole..."*

I had to listen to the last 8 minutes on the radio due to my own hockey game, so I apologize for missing anything good at the end of the game.

Until Thursday...

*We're getting closer and closer to a "pterodac-tile" or "long arm of the law, Steiggy!" slipping in there. I am giddy with anticipation...

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Game 17; Pens vs. Flyers

I didn't really get anything from this game. I watched it Sunday morning before having any coffee so I couldn't pay close attention. Though I did notice Errey talking about Jordan Staal's long reach. We're one step closer to the first "Long arm of the law, Steiggy!" of the season...

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Game 16; Pens vs. Rangers

Quote to sum up Jordan Staal's season thus far:
"It seems like we haven't talked about his mouth guard yet all season!"

Penguins "power moves" performed by: Malone (YES!) and Laraque.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Game 15; Pens vs. Flyers

On the discussion of which Finnish player on the Flyers has the coolest name:
"How come all the Finns get the cool names?"
"I think Nittymaki kinda sounds like sushi."

"First game back from a road trip, always a difficult situation. You gotta get the family in order...the dog...feed the goldfish, Steiggy!"

Side note: has anyone seen Jordan Staal? We could really use him...

Monday, November 5, 2007

Game 14; Pens vs. least popular team in hockey

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the first and probably last time Brooks Orpik will ever be compared to Magic Johnson:

"He looked like Magic Johnson on that one passing to Kareem Abdul Jabbar!"

Game 13; Pens vs. Isles

Yeah...I only saw about 30 seconds of this game with Errey announcing, so I got nothing...

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Game 12: Pens vs. Nordiques

"Speaking of Sauer, there are a lot of sour fans here right now."

I feel as though it should be noted that a discussion of Sabourin's (creepy baby) mask led to a discussion of whether or not penguins (the bird, not the team) like fish.

Steiggy: "We asked Sabourin if he played any other sports as a kid and he said he played shortstop for an elite travel baseball team in Quebec..."
Errey: "What would you have done if he had said chess?"
(20 seconds of silence with only awkward chuckles from both of them)
Errey: "Sorry, Steiggy. I didn't mean to put you on the spot there..."
Steiggy: "That's okay, I was thinking the same thing..."
(Editors note: I think my head just exploded...)

2 minutes later (I can't remember who said what here):
"He makes the save standing up like a chess player."
"Chess players stand up, don't they?"
Errey: "...Kasparov!"

After a too many men on the ice call:
Steiggy: "Too many Penguins."
Errey: "You can never have too many Penguins, can you?"

Crosby switches sticks twice in a span of 20 seconds. Another face off is about to take place 10 seconds later:
"I dare him to go get another stick!"

"Sauer was laying an egg on the ice! He wanted a whistle. Malone came out. He was the rooster with the egg!"

Pens "power moves" tonight performed by: Crosby, Malkin (Malone somehow shut out...even when he cut across the crease nearly leveling Theodore)

Jordan Staal's stick was finally compared to a fishing pole. It took long enough, but I'm glad we got that first one in. That's just one step closer to a "Pterodac-tile" or a "Long arm of the law, Steiggy!" slipping in there...

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Game 11; Pens vs. Wild

My plans get foiled yet again. Edzo was going to be the guest blog subject tonight (aka just documenting his bitterness over being fired), but Edzo wasn't one of the announcers. Bummer. We'll just have to settle for Doc Emrick tonight...

Sadly, Emrick did not announce either goalie making a save off their paraphernalia. He's usually good for 3-4 of those per game. Oh well, we'll just have to settle for the following statistic for tonight's game:

Estimated number of times Emrick got super excited and you thought something insane was happening even though it was a routine play: 3,243,541

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Game 10; Pens vs. Habs

Sorry, kids. Saw most of this game at a bar with no sound. Nothing to report from me. If I missed anything good, add it via the comments.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Game 9; Pens vs. Leafs

I really hope someone other than me saw the segment on Inside the NHL tonight that involved Gary Roberts and Mark Recchi grocery shopping at Whole Foods. If was phenomenal. And they ran into Daryl Sydor, who Recchi for some reason gave money to pay for his groceries. Needless to say, this segment was hilarious...

And now onto the game:

Steiggy: "...and Simon Gamache chases him into the corner. He said he wants to be called 'Simon' now and not 'Simone'."
Errey: " that what Simon says?"

Yipes...the entire "Hockey 101 with Bob Errey" segment between periods could be included in here. Tonight's feature was "terminology." Let's just say that he defined "back door" and "pickle stabber" as two of the many terms. After nearly every term, he said, "what are they talking aboot when they say '(insert word he's about to define here)'?"

Errey could not pronounce Tlusty's name to save his life. After his first goal, he pronounced it about five different ways until he gave up and remarked, "If you score enough in this league, we'll all figure out how to pronounce it!"

"Toskala tries to look over Hal Gill's shoulder, like that's going to happen..."

Ryan Malone finally had his first "power move" of the season. Congrats, Ryan! We are still without a Jordan Staal nickname though as far as I can tell...

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Game 7; Pens vs. Caps

Really not much to report tonight...

(Chris Clark barely misses a swipe at the puck that would have tied the game):
"If he was Clark Kent he would have found a way!"

Friday, October 19, 2007

Game 6; Pens vs. Hurricanes

First things anyone else extraordinarily creeped out by the baby on the side of Sabourin's mask? As Ryan and Nick both said, it looks like something out of Saw.

Errey was on a role tonight:

-(Malone wearing a mic for the game is shown asking Commodore if he wants to fight)
Errey: "Awww that's good stuff, Steiggy! He wasn't inviting him to go shopping. He was inviting him to a dance of a particular type!"

-"So elementary, my dear, it's beyond belief!"

-(Crosby gets tripped up as he tries to hurdle Cam Ward)
Errey: "If that was a steeple chase, he'd be out of luck right now."

-"Recchi thought he tickled the twine between the pillows of Cam Ward."

Okay...time to go have nightmares about that creepy baby on Sabourin's mask...

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Game 5; Pens vs. Devils

Sadly, not much to report from Errey tonight. I think he was too distracted getting text messages from Dave Hannan (which he apparently was re: number of current refs who are former NHL players. Hannan says the number is three).

One golden nugget though. Re: Malkin's goal vs. Brodeur last year (you know the one):

"There were a lot of jock straps left on the ice that night!"

Game 4 Addition

I don't know how this slipped my mind, but it did.

Steiggy was talking about the Cancer Awareness thing that all the teams were doing. Then, as play was going on mind you, came out with the best transition this side of Tony Danza:

"Speaking of cancer, Jason Blake..."

Wow. No more needs to be said on that one...

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Game 4; Pens vs. Leafs

So I was a bit slow in setting this up, but the Bob needs to be documented this season. In his Game 4 announcing, Errey shook off the off-season rust and brought his A-game.

I know I'll probably forget/butcher a lot of his quotes throughout the season, so feel free to add more and make corrections in the comments.

And now, without further adieu, Game 4:

- "This isn't tiddlywinks, Steiggy!"

- "That was like two ships colliding in the night!"

- "It's like email, Steiggy! know...sometimes you send it and it doesn't get there how you planned it!"

Number of "power moves" performed by Penguins (according to Steiggy): 1 (somehow, it wasn't even Ryan Malone...)

Also, is it my imagination or has Errey not used any nicknames for Jordan Staal yet this season? He needs to get that first Pterodac-tile in there, Steiggy!

Until tomorrow night...